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CHILDCARE



Internet Safety for Children

Another job for working women with kids – protecting our children in an online world.

By Michelle A. Robinson

"It's 10 p.m. Do you know where your children are?" asked a classic and often parodied public service TV commercial from the 1950s. For working mothers today, answering that question is both easier and more difficult than it was for our mothers and grandmothers. Where are our children? They are probably online. But what are they doing there, and whom are they doing it with? Those are pressing questions for parents in every household with an Internet connection.

Our kids are growing up in a world where 2 million e-mail messages are sent every second. They live in a country where 93 percent of kids between the ages of 12 and 17 use the Internet. In a little more than a decade, the Internet has radically changed the notion that keeping kids at home would keep them away from the dangers and temptations of the world. Now a click of a mouse brings the world into our homes and into our children's lives, adding a new and frightening twist to the juggling act we do to manage work and family needs. As business and professional women, we do have one big advantage. We use the same basic Internet technology at work that our children use at home. The devil, of course, lies in the applications.

No one can argue that the Web has advantages for children. It offers more educational resources than any public library. Your 4-year-old, for example, can amass great knowledge about the ocean by scuba diving with "Dora the Explorer" online. And those tools make for great bonding experiences with mom and dad – who are sometimes learning with their children. Our challenge as working mothers is to help youngsters explore the wonders of this incredible medium while avoiding its dangers.

Most online safety experts agree that the first line of defense against online sexual predators, scam artists and other online dangers is education – for you and your children. Approach this need the same way you would a professional challenge. Do some research, devise an action plan and execute.

Talk to your children openly and often about the need for responsible, safe behavior online. Many kids are still dangerously trusting about sharing personal information on the Web.

When the time comes for your youngsters to start navigating the Web, make sure you go along as the co-pilot. Sit with your child as he or she surfs the Web, and offer candid guidance on which websites are helpful and which are best avoided.

Finally, there's no shame in spying. That means being unapologetically assertive about knowing what your child does online when you're not part of the action. Check your kids' computer regularly to see what websites they've been visiting. Have they joined a social networking site, and what kind of information have they posted? Have they added any strangers' names to their instant messaging buddy lists? It's also easy to install a filter on your computer to block access to objectionable sites. You can get technical guidance from nonprofit groups like iSafe (isafe.com).

Here are a few Internet safety tips, courtesy of iSafe, to keep in mind as you lay down the rules with your children:

  • Always keep your child's computer in an open area. Never allow a computer with Internet access in a child's bedroom.

  • Communicate. Talk to your child about online dangers.

  • Let your kids know that you are there to help them out of a bad situation.

  • Become part of your child's online experience.

  • Regularly review computer files.

  • Teach your child the responsible use of online resources.

  • Talk to other parents about your experiences.

  • Let your child know that responsible adults do not pursue relationships with minors.

If you feel the slightest hint of guilt about dictating computer rules or snooping in your child's online life, think of this: You wouldn't hesitate about asking your kids where they're going and whom they'll be with when they walk out the front door, right? You need the same information when they walk out into cyberspace. This way you'll have a clear and confident answer when someone asks you a modern version of the age-old question: "Do you know where your children are – online?"

Michelle A. Robinson is a senior vice president for the southern region of Verizon Communications, which is actively involved in national efforts to keep the Internet safe for children by working with nonprofit Internet safety groups like iSafe (isafe.org) and with law enforcement agencies across the country.